what am i doing now?

ok been ages since i posted anything on her but what i doing now is moveing over to a blog and im posting pretty much everyday so feel free to fallow it here

http://thevamppoet.blogspot.com/

Collage has been good so far and I'm glad I'm in one.
I left the distraction of a gf that caused slot of problems for me so no I can focus on my schooling.

Art institute of Philly so far has been fun and a great exapearance

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I think it's time I let her go that's all I have to say

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Well today is the day I take my placement test for the art institute of Philly . This is going to be interesting.

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So yeah me and the gf have had a nice long talk and it seems it's all my fault that we had an argument along with that she blames her past for her"personality" and she doesn't think it's fair that she has to change her personality. And I said it not her personality it's a habit that was galliard by her explaining to me what a habit was....

She clearly doesn't get it at all but hell she needs to do something about her loose lips at least. Think before she speaks and stop using her past as an excuse.

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so yeah i have a girlfriend that is local and some long distance hell she is even liviung with me now. and she has to be this immature child with major attitude issue. she tries to give me order and be a third paraent to me and she is only 18 WTF?. i wish she would learn to keep her mouth shut but she just shoots it away without ant regard to what she says and who she is saying it too.

tossing my personal business out like its nothing but a game to her. then she cries and runs off like a little kid if i do happen to tell her off.

if she really wants this to work she will need to fix her attitude because living with me or not her mother is only a walking distance away from my house i will make her walk home and ill driop of her bags because im not dealing with her shit.

i dont care she had a bad past because im the damn present she is damn lucky i dont joke about her ""garbage"" like she does mine to her friends.

So i have been doing alot of art laely so if anyone wants to check it out here is my link


http://hiruglory.deviantart.com/

ok ok so yet another post after say....a year? give or take a few months anway yet another post after a epic long silence frankly i am even surprised i know my password still.

So yeah i had a nice good time today celebrateing " Lets be idiots day." driving my GF around [ P.S. new GF named Fran not with Missy anymore and hey! she is local yay!!]] anyway was driving her to her docters and getting lost on the way home with morons on the road. Then i get home annoyed and pissed off with the day but thankfully i had a nice little time with my GF before the rents got home ~wink wink~. Then when they do get home The Mother start getting on my case about crap that she told me not to worry about then the father gets in a bad mood because of her.

After dinner they start talking about getting a puppy which is awesome because since my Black lab Ashes was put down i been wanting a new dog. mMy dad found a good puppy and was at the very end of the pre-adoption app and OF COURSE my mother has to be bi-polor and slip a damn comment about just getting a pre-house broken dog/puppy out of the freaken blue and my already peeved father closes the unfinished app and just goes ." forget it" God i Wish my mom would keep a single mindset for at least a good day for once and they both stop acting like children. i wanted that damn dog too...a lab mix just like Ashes.


So now for a major update.

as you may have guessed im living back with the rents and not with my sister. so far so good other then the normal bullcrap but iv been dealing with it other then thae fact my entire Magic The Gathering collection went into the trasg because my mother found me and the gf playing. ugh...was going to at least sell them.

and of course moveing back i met my new GF nice little woman and great to talk to among many other things.
been about 2 months we been together and she lives with me now as well. so far so good and im pretty happy how things are going.

no other details other then trying to get a car and a job which in this state has been a crap shoot.

Well this week has been going badly. my Job has been moving my schedule around and that has peeving my sister off along with with her daily life things that has been bothering her aswell so she been getting piled on with stress.

and that in turn with my job wearing me out it seems the lack of sleep has been having me slack around and seemingly bad attitude with her so we been banging heads as of late.

then along with this?

Well when i lived in NJ i dated a girl Named brandy we split up shortly a few months before i moved to PA and started dating Missy. She didn't want a long distance relationship so we remained friends though we still loved each other. any to get to my point. the Wednesday of the 3rd of this month i decided to look her up on Facebook since we haven't talked in awhile and i left the site we used to keep contact. well i couldn't find her so i went back to the old site to find her sister Layla. well i found Layla and found out Brandy passed away two months ago from cervical cancer. i was numb for the rest of this week and when Friday came up the Reality of her death set in and i fought myself trying not to break down crying in the middle of work. about half way through my shift i calmed down but i was still battling slightly. when my Brother in law picked me up later on to take me to my train to go to NJ to visit my parents we had a little talk and he showed me a txt my sister sent him about how upset she was with me and how i have been acting aroud the house and being unhelpful ect... . we talked about about how i could help and how i can make my sisters mood better and then i set off to NJ for this weekend and im heading home tonight.

with all this weekend i had to think over things and figure out i came up a solution. and also had time to see old friend and cheer me up from all the problems and sutch

im hoping my sister and chad will not freak out as soon as i speak and let me explain

but i think my reasons are good enough and fair and logical.

but just in case
Bunny if you read this before i get home ill explain what im talking about as soon as i get home.

Well borke up with my girlfriend the day i came home from CTT/WTT forget witch. It went better then o thaugh yeah we were both upset but she understood my reason ans she handled it pretty well. Knowing her i knew it still hurt and it stil hurt me but i didnt fully realize how badly it did. being empathic im pretty good at keeping my emotions controlled so sometimes i even fool myself that im fine when im not.

a few days after the break up i kept getting Facebook messages asking if i was fine and ok and how i was and i kept saying i was fine.

then sometime tonight i was role playing with sme friends and was writeinf a sotroy about my character who lost her family children and spouse then as i was writeing it really struck me just how badly upset with the break up i really was and tears rolled and i could help but cry out of no where.

im hoping it blows over cuz feeling like this i dont want to be a deally thing with it just hitting me from nowhere like that.